Closer to the deep

Peace and quiet is never really in the house, it is in our hearts. I know I seek it sometimes amongst the noise and fury of a busy place and I can find it. I just have to listen.

Our inner lives is a whole other world that we have access to. There is a depth in each of us that waits to be explored. Our inner lives are interesting.

I find myself asking the questions and I find myself coming up with the answers. I don't do this alone of course. I turn to writers, thinkers, friends and family as I wonder. Whatever their answers are it seems that when I give myself time to think, I have the opportunity to let their ideas meet my own. 

I enjoy trying to make meaning and come to some understanding about why we are the way we are. I am not just trying to understand myself but the others around me. I am interested in how we respond to each other, how we treat each other. I am curious about why we are the way we are.

I know the answers I come up with are only ever possibilities. There is no definitive reason why I feel or act a certain way. Yet I find it interesting to wonder. And this wonder often leads me to some self understanding and helps me make sense of my life.

So much of this thinking happens as I walk, as I make, and as I write. Reflection, both self and other, is an important part of being engaged in life. Reflection in a way frees us from the harshness of judgement. It does not make our waywardness right or good, no, but it does help us understand who we are and why we live in the world as we do.

It is the quiet inside of ourselves that brings us to this new place. It is finding solitude even in a crowd. Perhaps when we peel an orange we breathe in its scent. Perhaps when we pull a shawl over our shoulder we recognize its weight and its warmth. When we feel the beauty and the power of the world around us we feel ourselves. We recognize our own senses, our own humanity.

We must be present to hear the whispers. We must be listening. It is in those simple times when I am really there that I feel the presence of something greater than myself, God or the divine, the miracle of life. In trying to be there for myself I find the other. 

In trying to understand myself I also find compassion, not just for me but for the people I travel with. In understanding ourselves, we understand others. In our own growth we understand how others grow. When we understand we can love, and when we understand we can also forgive. Whenever I feel a small slight I try to imagine myself in a similar situation and often I forgive. That ability we have to reflect on ourselves and our own thoughts and actions is one that can free us from blaming. My mother would have just said, "Put yourself in their shoes." And I do.

We have the freedom to think and imagine, the freedom to travel deep within ourselves. I have that freedom and it is powerful and beautiful. It is strengthening and it is redeeming. It takes the ordinary and brings it closer to the deep.