Right now I feel totally beat. Yet I come to this chair to sit and write to you because this is renewal.
It is my time. So though you enjoy these Sunday Letters I have to confess, I write them for myself as much as for you. They started out for you I think when I actually formulated the idea of a Sunday Letter, but they have become for us. Something that we share.
The need to express myself rises from somewhere deep inside of me, inside of us really, remember those drawings on the caves in France? We all have this need and when we release it something releases inside of ourselves.
I know that when I started clacking the keyboard today a hush would come over me. I would fall into focus. I would fall in love. That is the power of self expression. The sheer joy of getting lost in what one is doing. You sit down at three o'clock and before you know it, it is five o'clock.
Already, I feel less tired. Love is potent. Creativity feeds your energy. It is an exercise for the heart as well as the mind.
I have to tell you, I have very little balance in my life and I am not looking for it. My work, my writing, my hooking, my community near and far feed me. Literally and metaphorically. Our creative communities provide us with the juice we need. I rest, I read, I walk, and you might think that provides you with balance but really I carry my creative life into all of these.
That's it, once we commit, it is all or nothing I suppose. That joy you seek can be found in everything. Those words you write, even in a card to a friend become more beautiful, kinder, more thoughtful because somewhere in the week you took the time to make. The time to be. The time to feel the gush of creativity. It flows through you at first and then it flows out of you. All you have to do is show up and make.
Hand over hand, that soothing, it comes with it.
Sometimes it comes from ten minutes at the frame, or a walk down the street, or writing a letter to someone who matters.
Renewal. I think I am seeking renewal more than I am seeking balance. Something restorative to bring me back to my quiet self.
For in each of us there is a quiet self that is looking for attention. It wants to be recognized, and nurtured. It is the part of you that wants to make, to sit quietly with your hook in hand and profess the love you have for it. Your quiet self needs to be loved and you can do that through making.
Thank you for taking the time to read today. I so appreciate that you do.